When it comes to wedding planning, the word compromise might not be in your vocabulary. You don’t have to be a total bridezilla to want everything your way, and while we understand you want everything to be perfect, it’s important to take your fiancé’s opinion into account too. You’re not the only one getting married after all.
He wants a small, simple wedding with 50 people in a country house, you want a big, lavish affair with 200. These are two very different weddings, and chances are, you’ll both have to compromise. Make a list of the qualities that are most important to you (bearing in mind, the one who wants the bigger wedding needs to evaluate if they’re happy to sacrifice that much of their budget on the size of the wedding). Once you’ve made the list, compare and contrast what are the most important qualities. There are hundreds of venues all over the country and there will definitely be some middle ground where you can both be satisfied.
The budget can easily be a difference in opinion and it won’t even just be about how much your budget should be, but about where the budget is going to go. Naturally, the biggest chunk will go to the reception, but do you want to save on the cake and spend on the photographer? Does he was to spend more on the menu and skip the videographer? Again, make a list of priorities about what’s most important to you and see where you agree. Then come to a compromise about the rest. And remember, communication is key. If something is really important to your groom, learn to listen and loosen your own grip. You’ll want him to do the same when it comes to what is most important to you.
For this one, you’re really going to have to live and let live. We know it’s difficult, but if he really wants a certain type of suit, you have to let him have it. What would you say if he insisted on a certain type of wedding dress for you? Yeah, that’s what we thought. It’s his wedding day just as much as it is yours, even though it doesn’t always seem that way, so you have to let him marry you in the clothes that he wants. Even if he asks for your help, his opinion should ultimately be the most important when it comes to his own suit.
Believe it or not, it is possible to successfully blend your tastes, even if they’re drastically different. Take care not to let colours clash, but if you both have a strong sense of style, blending them together can make your wedding décor extra special, as your guests will be able to see both your personalities ‘marry well’. Get it? If you’re rushing to tell him his quirky comic book style table numbers don’t go with your vintage favours, take a step back. He’s probably thinking the exact same thing about your favours, so why does your idea trump his? Again, decide which elements are the most important, and find a way to marry them.
Happily ever after
Ultimately, marriage will always be about compromise, because no two people are exactly the same. How well you communicate, listen and learn to compromise on differing opinions throughout the wedding planning process will help train you for compromising on bigger decisions in your future together. Your wedding is the perfect opportunity to compromise on something that is equally about both of you. Communicate with your groom every step of the way and make sure both of your opinions are heard.