You’ve just got engaged, and you’ve popped the question to your bridesmaids. Now you’ve assembled your team of helpers, they’ll stop at nothing to help you plan your wedding, find your dream dress and generally keep you happy. But, as much as it’s their job to keep you happy, you should also aim to keep your bridesmaids happy. They are the ones who will be with you throughout the whole process after all.
Let them have input
We know it’s your wedding, but you’re not the one who’s going to be wearing the bridesmaid dress. It’s common for a bride to choose something that is their style but doesn’t suit their bridesmaids. The best thing to do for your bridesmaids is to let them have some input into the dress selection. Give them colour swatches or look at the option of having mismatched bridesmaids. At the very least, give them some dress options and a chance to air any particular worries about style or colour. Your bridesmaids will thank you for letting them have a say
Don’t overspend on the dresses
This one is really a no brainer, no matter what your situation is. It’s quite common for brides to foot the bill for their bridesmaids’ dresses but if you’re not, make sure you have their bank accounts in mind when looking at dress options. Don’t select one that will set your ‘maids back a couple of hundred if they’re paying the bill themselves. No matter how many times they tell you, it’s highly unlikely that they’re ever going to shorten it and wear it again. So before you ask them to fork out a pretty penny for a lavish dress, consider their finances. On the flipside, offering to pay for your bridesmaids attire is lovely and quite common, but when choosing the dresses, don’t forget about the shoes and accessories you have to think about and the fact that one expensive dress is multiplied by your bridesmaid number, not to mention any possible alterations.
Think about the practicalities of the dresses
Do you have them in short, strapless dresses in November? What about sky-high heels that none of them can walk in? When you’re picking your ideal bridesmaid ensemble, remember that you’re not the one who has to walk around in it all day. Make sure they’re not too hot, too cold or too uncomfortable. After all, it’s meant to be an enjoyable day for them too and if they have to stay in that dress and those shoes all day, you should make sure that’s a reasonable request.
Don’t overwork your bridesmaids
They’re there to help you, not to be your slaves for a year. Don’t have all your bridesmaids running around after you for every appointment, nor should you have them staying up all night the day before the wedding making DIY party favours. Their help has limits, and you have to be realistic. The easiest way to do this is to delegate evenly. You don’t need all your bridesmaids for everything but you can have one without calling the whole team. Equally, don’t call them with every little thing and an hour’s notice and expect them to come running at the drop of a hat. Even if your life is all about your wedding, doesn’t mean theirs are. They have other things to do.
Say thank you with gifts
Thank your bridesmaids, and we don’t just mean a quick “thanks” at the end of the day. Say it with flowers, say it with chocolate, or say it with any personal gift you can think of, or treat them all to a meal out. Anything special that will make them feel appreciated. It’s a lot of work for them too and no doubt they put a lot of time and effort into making sure your day went off without hitch so it’s important that you treat them to a little something to say thank you.
Introduce the bridesmaids to each other
If your bridesmaids don’t know each other, make an effort to introduce them. Perhaps all go out for drinks or dinner to have a proper night of introductions and bonding. They’re probably going to be working together on your hen party and it would be better if they knew each other before then. Not to mention they will be together a lot at the actual wedding and it’ll be a lot easier on all of them if they already get on. And why wouldn’t they? They all know and love you!
Back away from the bridal shower
It’s their job to take care of your hen party or bridal shower, so let them. Don’t be a bridezilla that insists on taking over because you’re worried about how it will turn out. If you have genuine things that you don’t want, then maybe nudge one in the right direction, but apart from that let them organise it. They’re your best girls, they most likely know you better than you think.
Don’t only talk about your wedding
No doubt you will be meeting up with your bridesmaids a lot for wedding prep. But what did you ever talk about before your wedding? Lots of things. Make sure you schedule time to meet up with your bridesmaids and not talk about the wedding. If you generally meet up with them on their own then all the better. This will reduce the chance of wedding talk. We know the wedding is all that’s going on in your life at the moment, but what’s going on in their lives? Make sure you put a ban on wedding talk on the days you’re just meeting up as friends and not as bride and bridesmaid.
Image credits: Coral dresses: Bride Bug | Black dresses: Lindsay Madden Phototgraphy via Style Me Pretty | Pastel dresses: Elizabeth Anne Designs | Cream dresses: Pinterest